go on, lie

LYING.

everyone does it, no one is exempted from it.

today, we went to watch The Karate Kid with my family and in the movies, they never let you bring your camera inside because of fear that you might be a film pirate trying to steal the movie to sell to others. that may be true, but i don't think people who go to those kinds of malls do that.

anyway, i always bring my camera with me in my bag because you'll never know when you will want to take pictures. normally when i watch a movie, they never get my camera because i hide it so well. but on this particular check up, the guard got a hold of my camera. it wasn't in a normal camera case, but in a quilted pouch. he got it and asked me "is this a camera?" i could have said yes and just left it with him until after the movie, but i find it such a hassle to have to do it. i'm not a film pirate anyway, so why should they take my camera? so i said NO. it's a phone. then i took out my other quilted pouch with had my phone and showed him the phone. he opened the camera pouch to take a peek, and i thought i would get busted for lying to him. i almost blurted out "oh, it's a camera." but he let me go. apparently, he believed me.

when i sat down, i should have felt relieved that i got to go through, but i didn't. instead, i felt wretched and guilty for lying. crazy, but my conscience got the best of me. now you could say that it was a small lie, a white lie - it wasn't like i lied about killing someone. but even the smallest of lies have it's way of creeping up on you. i tried to tell myself that it was fine, at least i didn't get caught and it was just a tiny lie. but what if i did get caught? the guard would catch me lying and plus, i would get totally embarrassed to have been lying about a measly camera.

i don't know what has gotten over me, but i feel like i've become different. like, good different though :) i have chosen to be a better person, and the first step is to NOT lie. i know that now. actions always have consequences and i just got lucky this time.

but next time, i'm not so sure if i'll still be lucky enough.☻